Tag Archives: awards

Mommy Switzerland

I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives. ~ Billy Connolly

Those of you who’ve been around for a while know that I have zero patience for the Mommy Wars. ZEE. RO. I’ve written about it twice (here and here), and I’m sure I’ve alluded to it many other times. Women bullying other women — grown women — over making different parenting choices is one of the stupidest things I can think of. I keep thinking, “Why can’t we all just agree that being a parent is hard, and that we’re all doing the best we can? Why do some people have to hurl abuse at people who breastfeed too long/don’t breastfeed/stay at home/go back to work/use cloth diapers/use disposable diapers/co-sleep/crib sleep/WHATEVER? Bitch, please.” It doesn’t even make sense to me.

I mean, yeah, I can be a judgmental a**hole sometimes. I’ve put a lot of thought into my parenting decisions, and I take them seriously. Sometimes, when I see another parent feeding their kid Cheetos and purple ‘juice’, I think nasty head-thoughts. But I try really hard to catch myself before all my a**holery comes out of my mouth, and I remind myself that I am not a judge, or a jury, or in any way threatened by parents who make other choices than mine. I bitch slap my judgmental a**hole self and put her back into the dark corner of my mind where she usually lurks, muttering to herself about being ignored.

Nobody puts Baby in the corner!

So I found this page called The Mom Pledge, by means of this open letter to moms, where bloggers and other internet-savvy women are banding together against the bullies of the Mommy Wars. In order to participate, I have to pledge:

  • I am a proud to be a mom. I will conduct myself with integrity in all my online activities. I can lead by example.
  • I pledge to treat my fellow moms with respect. I will acknowledge that there is no one, “right” way to be a good mom. Each woman makes the choices best for her family.
  • I believe a healthy dialogue on important issues is a good thing. I will welcome differing opinions when offered in a respectful, non-judgmental manner. And will treat those who do so in kind.
  • I stand up against cyber bullying. My online space reflects who I am and what I believe in. I will not tolerate comments that are defamatory, hateful or threatening.
  • I refuse to give those who attack a platform. I will remove their remarks with no mention or response. I can take control.
  • I want to see moms work together to build one another up, not tear each other down. Words can be used as weapons. I will not engage in that behavior.
  • I affirm that we are a community. As a member, I will strive to foster goodwill among moms. Together, we can make a difference.

I do so pledge. In doing so, I have officially become a citizen of Mommy-Switzerland. My house is being renamed Geneva, and to get inside you must speak at least three languages.

I’m expecting one of these guys to show up at my door any day now. (Photo by Greatpatton)

I encourage you to also join this League of Mommies (see what I did there?) by taking the pledge, joining the community, and (if applicable) adding their button to your blog. Let’s make a stand against bullying. We, the parents, are the grown-ups, and it’s up to us to stop acting like children.


On a MUCH lighter note, I’ve been given two more awards! Yay!

The first is The Illuminating Blogger award, given to me by the intimidatingly talented Brigitte of Brigitte’s Banter. You want a blog that’s ACTUALLY illuminating, inspiring, and downright funny? Click on that there link, my friend.

Thank you, Brigitte, for this award! It’s not one I ever expected to get, since I don’t think of myself as particularly illuminating, unless you find things like poop, bad poetry, and drinking too much to be really eye-opening. I am truly honored by this, and I hope that you’ll continue to find in my writing something Illuminating!

I’ve also been given the Beautiful Blogger Award, by the lovely poet and all-around clever fella Merlinspielen. Aside from leaving razor-sharp witty comments on humor blogs, Merlinspielen writes some fantastic poetry — here’s a recent one that I particularly enjoyed, but you should definitely delve into his archives (hmm, there might be a double-entendre there) to see all of his stuff (and another one! I’m on a roll).

Don’t worry, he gave me the award for my writing — this was before the post about my breasts. Thank you, Merlinspielen, for this award. It’s another one that I never expected to come my way, but I’m so glad that you find beauty in what I spew write on the interwebz. You’re awesometastic.

For both of these awards, I’m supposed to nominate five other bloggers, but I’m going to break that rule. Rather than spending the next hour combing through my reader for ten worthy folks (how to narrow it down?) who don’t already have these awards, I’m just going to give both of them to one person: Bri DeRosa of Red, Round, or Green. She writes Beautifully and Illuminatingly about food, family, and all the issues surrounding those two things. I enjoy her blog greatly, even as a non-cook, though I do have to wonder why she never comes to my house to make my lunch. THAT WOULD BE EXCELLENT. Maybe I should make that a requirement to accept the awards … nah. She deserves them, even if her mad cooking skills make me look like a schmuck. Congratulations, Bri!

The Sunshine Award

A good laugh is sunshine in the house. ~ William Makepeace Thackeray

My friend MagicallyMad over at Not Quite Lost has given me the Sunshine Award!

I’m really honored by this — in giving this to me, she’s saying that my writing is making her happier, and if you read her blog, you’ll see why that’s such a big deal to me. MagicallyMad, thank you so much, and I sincerely hope that I can continue to make you laugh!

To accept the award, I need to link back to the blogger who gave it to me — which I did, and you should totally check her out — answer ten questions about myself, and nominate other bloggers.

The questions:

  • What is your favorite bad habit? Probably spending too much time on the computer.
  • How old are you? As old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth.
  • What is your favorite time of day? The time right before turning off the light, when I have sleep ahead of me and can read a chapter of my book uninterrupted.
  • What is your favorite time of year? My birthday time. So, autumn.
  • Who is your favorite dead celebrity? John Lennon.
  • What is your favorite Christmas movie? This obscure movie from the 1970’s that we had recorded off of TV when I was a kid, called Quincy’s Quest. Here are the first few minutes of it on YouTube. As far as I know, it’s not available on DVD, but you can get a feel for this bizarre little bit of my childhood even so. It really is very weird, and it only gets weirder as the movie progresses, so if you’re into that kind of thing I strongly encourage you to watch the whole thing. It’s absolutely worth the time.
  • Who is your favorite philosopher? Dr Seuss.
  • What was your favorite vacation? A trip to Romania back in 2008. I might write about it sometime.
  • What is your favorite physical activity? Sleeping.
  • What is your favorite thing? Raindrops on roses. No wait! Whiskers on kittens. Or is it bright copper kettles, or warm woolen mittens? I’m conflicted.

Now I need to give the award to other bloggers who bring some sunshine into my life. These are blogs that I look forward to reading everyday, that always make me smile, and that more often than not make me laugh out loud. I don’t mean LOL, which seems to me like a frequently insincere internet device; I mean laughing out loud, probably with coffee dribbling down my face or spraying onto the computer screen. Here you go.

I also just found out (because I was incommunicado for so long) that I have been Freshly Slapped over at Sincerely, Slapdash. This is similar to being Freshly Pressed, which is the Holy Grail of WordPressdom, except that I didn’t have to sacrifice any goats or give any sexual favors in order to obtain this honor.

Since my sidebar is becoming rather cluttered, I’m going to take my awards out of my sidebar (with the exception of a few, unique ones) and put them all in an awards page. That way they’re all displayed, but they won’t confuse you eyes or slow your load times. See? I’m thoughtful like that.

My Head Is All ‘Splodey Because Of The Awesome

There is no “i” in team but there is in win. ~ Michael Jordan

This is getting ridiculous. In only the best ways, of course, but ridiculous nevertheless.

Lora over at F-Words has given me two — that’s right, TWO — awards!

First, she-of-the-generous-spirit gifted me with the Reader Appreciation Award.

This one has some rules:

  • Thank and link to your nominator. Thank you, Lora, so much! This is awesome!
  • Answer the ten included questions.
  • Nominate 10-12 bloggers you enjoy and provide links to these blogs, and let the bloggers know that they’ve been nominated.

And here are the questions:

  • Are you ready for the questions? Sure. I did some stretches, warmed up my vocal cords a bit. Gimme your best shot.
  • What is your favorite color? Blue. No, yel — AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH.
  • What is your favorite animal? A My Little Hippogriff.
  • What is your favorite non-alcoholic drink? You can drink things that aren’t alcoholic? Isn’t that unsanitary? (In all seriousness, though … coffee. Bitter, wonderful nectar of the caffeinated gods.)
  • Do you prefer Facebook or Twitter? Well, I’m not on Twitter, so I suppose it’s Facebook by default. Speaking of which, why don’t you just go ahead and click here?
  • What is your favorite pattern? Um, one that I don’t have to sew? One that I don’t have to answer a multiple-choice question about? And also this one:

OoooOOOoooOOOooooh, preeeeeeetttttttyyyyyyyyyyyyy ………

  • Do you prefer giving or getting presents? That depends. Do you have something you want to give me?
  • What is your favorite number? 8.
  • What is your favorite flower? One that’s pretty, perennial, and requires absolutely no care in order to thrive.
  • What is your passion? Acting. And making an ass of myself online, obviously. Which is really just like acting, only nobody can see my face. Or whether I’m wearing pants.

Now I need to give this to 10 – 12 other bloggers. Most of the folks that I would want to give it to have it already, but here it goes. One list of links!

Oh God, My Wife Is German

The Book of Alice


Pile of Babies

Fear No Weebles

Yes, that’s only five, but I’m tired and Sausage will be waking up soon, so that’s what you get today.

As for the OTHER award that Lora gave me, it’s fantabulosity puts all others to shame, because she made it herself! It’s my new favorite, alongside The Three Red Bins of Blogging Award. It is …

The Blogtastic Blog Award!

And since there’s really nothing I can say that wouldn’t detract from the sheer magnificence of this award, I’ll be leaving this post here.

Well, after reminding you to comment on my last post for a chance to win some pretty nifty prizes, of course. The drawing will be on Friday!